Summary: Although people often long to resume activities they enjoy, many intentionally wait to do so, hoping the moment will feel more meaningful. New research finds that the longer people perceive their absence from an activity, the more likely they are to postpone returning to it—even for simple, pleasurable actions like visiting friends or dining out.
Across surveys and controlled experiments, researchers show that perceived elapsed time influences return behavior. Rather than rushing back after a long break, people frequently delay reengagement because they want the return occasion to be “extra special.” This reveals a lesser-known form of postponement: delaying pleasure rather than avoiding effort.
Key Facts:
- Perceived time affects choice: When people feel they have been away for a long time, they are more likely to put off returning to enjoyable activities.
- Emotional meaning drives delay: Many people delay pleasurable activities because they want the first opportunity back to feel particularly significant.
- Procrastination of joy: This pattern explains a form of procrastination that differs from avoiding unpleasant tasks—people delay positive experiences that would boost their immediate well-being.
Source: PNAS Nexus
People often postpone returning to activities they like, new research shows.
Intuitively, if someone has been unable to do something pleasurable—whether catching up with friends, going to a movie, or dining out—you might expect them to take the first chance to return. However, Linda Hagen and Ed O’Brien find a different tendency: when people perceive that a long time has passed since their last enjoyable experience, they often choose to wait even longer to reengage.
The research included multiple studies: surveys conducted after COVID-19 shutdowns and laboratory-style experiments. In surveys, many Americans reported intentionally waiting longer to return to restaurants, theaters, parties, vacations, and family visits so that the first return would feel more satisfying. Participants said they delayed because they wanted the occasion to be more meaningful than an ordinary day.
In one experiment with 200 college students, participants chose between sending a brief appreciation message to a friend (a simple, rewarding action) or doing a tedious work task. Students who had contacted their friend recently—on average about a week earlier—were more likely to reach out immediately: 55% did so. By contrast, only 41% of students who had not contacted that friend for a long period—about a year—opted to send the message.
A related study with adult participants asked people to text a short “hello” to a friend. The results mirrored the student experiment: longer perceived gaps in contact made people less likely to reinitiate communication right away. When interviewed about their choices, many participants explained they wanted their first interaction after a long absence to feel special, so they postponed until they could create a more marked occasion.
According to the authors, these findings highlight an important psychological mechanism behind certain kinds of delay behavior. Instead of avoiding a difficult or unpleasant task, people sometimes delay experiences that would increase their happiness because they place a higher symbolic value on the first return after a long break. In other words, “right now” may never seem significant enough.
About this psychology research news
Author: Ed O’Brien
Source: PNAS Nexus
Contact: Ed O’Brien – PNAS Nexus
Image: The image is credited to Neuroscience News
Original Research: Open access. “Lost time undermines return behavior” by Ed O’Brien et al., published in PNAS Nexus.
Abstract
Lost time undermines return behavior
People routinely experience long gaps between opportunities to engage in activities they enjoy. While it might seem logical that a longer gap would make someone more eager to return, five experiments demonstrate the opposite pattern: as the perceived time since the last enjoyable encounter increases, people are more likely to postpone returning. A key reason is that they expect their return to be notably special to compensate for the wait.
This phenomenon appeared across multiple contexts and controls. For example, participants were less likely to contact close friends after larger gaps in communication—even when that choice decreased their immediate happiness. The effect also surfaced in post-pandemic settings: people delayed reentering everyday activities after long shutdowns, often waiting longer to mark the occasion in a memorable way rather than accepting an ordinary opportunity to return.
Further experiments showed the effect could be reduced by encouraging participants to view any return as potentially special, rather than reserving specialness for a distant, ideal moment. Overall, the findings indicate that perceived time gaps create self-imposed psychological barriers to reengagement, which can lead to cycles of further avoidance. Helping people reconceive ordinary opportunities as meaningful could promote quicker returns to experiences that enhance well-being.